People Who Look Like the Frankenstein Monster
There are two types of people in the world: those who look like the Frankenstein monster and everyone else, (which includes those who like to make fun of people who look like the Frankenstein monster—there are others who say there are two groups of people in the world, those who divide the world into two different groups, and those who don’t, but we digress).
Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley’s Frankenstein was considered by many who contribute to Wikipedia to be among the very the first works of science fiction, foreshadowing eugenics and pointedly critiquing the Industrial Revolution—and written when the noted Londoner was just 19.
Shelley’s depiction of the monster varies considerably from the one with which we’re familiar today, as her creature takes refuge in the woods, is taken in by a peasant family, and then becomes eloquent in French. In the Boris Karloff film version, he’s a less than eloquent Robert de Niro.
Anyway, here’s a rundown of some famous people who shall be immortalized as ‘the Modern Prometheus.’
David Cronenberg, Canadian gore master, directed History of Violence, Eastern Promises, Scanners, The Dead Zone. He is one of the principal originators of what is commonly known as the ‘venereal horror genre’—we’re not sure what this means, but are awaiting the test results.
In the early part of his career, he explored how the psychological melded with the physical with such titles as Scanners, one of the all time best films in which a human head blows up.
Kerry came to exemplify the wooden, aloof, awkward northeastern Dem. This limousine liberal is currently giving his ‘I coulda been somebody, I coulda been a contenda’ speech in the back of one. The Frankenstein monster had a more compelling persona.
In Forbes’ 2008 World’s Richest People ranking, Ballmer was ranked the 43rd in the world, with an estimated wealth of $15 billion, some of which we’ll gladly take as a pay off in exchange for removing what is below. At 43rd, if he goes out for lunch with Buffet or Gates, they’re buying. As far as Frankenstein goes, don’t take our word for it, please see the video ‘Frankensteve’.
Frankensteve
Honorable Mentions.
Kevin McHale. Former NBA power forward, who has more rings than a Liberace auction .
McHale appeared in an episode of Cheers during which he became obsessed with counting the floorboards at the Boston Garden.
Billy Joel. Pens quite loathsome music and we cannot bring ourselves to defend any of it, already physically and mentally spent from the Glenn Frey entry.
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