This week I did not update any post for my blog because of two reasons: one, I am sick for almost two days and two, we have our midterm examination in school. This week is very hard for me, taking exams while I’m sick and then the same method for another subject. That thing is very mind-suffocating for me.
I had a feeling last Sunday afternoon that I will have a feeling of colds and what ended up for me for tomorrow is flu. My head aches all the time aside from having cough and colds. What am I gonna do if it is the examination week? I’m scared to take an exam with that feeling of my body but I’m scared also for taking those exams late but still I thought of it first. If I will be excuse for my subjects in my examination schedules, it will be scheduled for another time when I am feeling well and it can benefit me because I have a longer time to review. But I still urge myself to review despite of my condition. I don’t read books and other notes and lectures because reading may cause me headache so I borrow my sister’s phone and then I record all the notes and lectures that I must review and then listen to it all over again. For others, too much thinking will cause them headache but for me, even if I’m sick I always thought of many things but I just don’t like reading or taking any radiation from TVs, cellphones, computers, etc. That may give me some headache so I recorded it all.
In some good heavens, I recited it all in my head and the review strategy worked well. Now I just have to go to my schedules and take the exams, but the problem is my condition. What if I take an exam and my condition goes worst that might forbid me to take another exam in another subject? So I decided to stay home and get some rest while reviewing myself on my subjects. I decided to take my examination if I am feeling better. Suddenly, my prayers are answered, in just two days I felt well enough to take exams. So I take exams the following day with my own understanding and knowledge gained from self-study.
But unfortunately, my exams on my subjects does not feeling well too. I am confident that I might pass those exams but I am not satisfied for what I did. Sometimes I thought that it was just numbers that appears in your grade. Your knowledge and experience gained from studying are still worthless than your grades. They might plausible to others but I think the other side. Sometimes I envy my classmates that have higher grades than me. I just don’t want myself being left behind by the others whom you know you can beat. But life is too cruel sometimes, that you might experience all bad karmas you could ever experience. It is not just time for you to become success. Opportunities that came to our lives may change us for good or for bad. Each opportunity is very differ to others so if your grabbed one, don’t lose the chance for it. Sometimes we just thought that opportunities have just passes us and we never notice them. Sometimes we just thought that this opportunity is still to come. But for every doing, we must do our best of best, as if it is the last time for us.
People are brittle, but unbreakable as it is. Lots of things may change and expect that you can hope from yourself but not from the others.
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